Silencing the Haters

Welcome to my weekly Operation Melt update where I share progress updates from my continued fitness journey and the important lessons it is teaching me about life.


Messages from the haters

When you set out on a journey of self improvement and transformation you are going to hear some things from the haters. The haters don’t want you to succeed. They don’t want you to be “better” than them. They don’t want you to make them look bad. They don’t want any risk to their comfort.

What are some of the messages you hear from the haters?

Your goal is stupid.

You are never going to be successful.

Who do you think you are?

Are you ready to quit yet?

What do you mean you’re a runner? How dare you think of yourself as an athlete? You are never going to finish a half marathon so why waste your time?

These messages are so harsh that most haters won’t say them to you directly. But one hater, the most insidious of all, will say these and even worse things directly to you. And not just once.

Just who is this hater and how can you stop them? Read on…

Hearing Voices

Each one of us has a little voice inside us.

This inner voice we have can be super helpful. As our conscience, it can help guide our decisions. As our intuition, it can tell us what our gut is telling us. It can even be that little inkling that something around us isn’t quite right and help us keep our guard up.

At its best, our inner voice can be a big motivator. It can be that voice that says “I can do this” when facing a challenge. It can also be that voice that pushes us to go further by saying things like “I bet I can get to the finish line faster than that other guy.”

But this voice isn’t always this helpful and positive.

Negative Self Talk

Our little voice inside us can be our biggest critic. Our biggest doubter. Our inner voice can be our biggest, meanest, rudest and most hurtful hater. It can complete shake our confidence and convince us to give up. Even worse, it can convince us not to even try to accomplish our goals or make our dreams come true. This little voice is the main reason that goals die of loneliness.

This happens when this inner voice transitions to negative self talk. This is when that voice makes us question ourselves and believe that we can’t accomplish our goals. Even worse, negative self talk makes us think we aren’t worthy of accomplishing our goals. This inner voice can be completely unfiltered and more hurtful than any other hater will ever be.

Have you experienced negative self talk?

Silencing Your Inner Critic

While your inner critic, your inner hater, is very powerful it is far from invincible. There are strategies you can employ to stop the inner critic from destroying your happiness.

Highlight Reel: last week I talked about your personal highlight reel and this is a time when that reel becomes super helpful. Reflect on your past victories, you have probably had many of them. Think about how hard fought these battles were yet you prevailed. By reflecting on these past highlights you can remind yourself of your strength and ability to succeed. If you did it then, you can do it now and you aren’t asking your inner critic for input.

Affirmations: while reminding yourself of how strong and capable you are you have another option. By seeking out inspirational and motivational quotes, sayings, photos and videos, you can put your brain in a can-do place which is the enemy of the inner critic. Seek out these things and keep focusing on moving the right directions. Here is one of my favorites that I often listen to while running to get that extra boost of confidence.

Cheerleaders: the final way to silence that inner critic is by enlisting help from others. There are plenty of people out there who want to see you succeed and want you to be happy. Surround yourself with these people. Their positive energy will help give you that extra push to help make your inner voice stopping holding you back. I have several cheerleaders, especially my wife, and I rely on them a lot to help me keep moving forward.

How have you learned to silence your biggest hater?

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About Operation Melt

Operation Melt started as a blog to share my personal transformation and weight loss story. After achieving success with that goal, Operation Melt has evolved into a platform that to help inspire, motivate and equip people to achieve their own personal and professional goals so they can live their best lives. My vision is to build a world where no goal ever dies of loneliness.